The Lesser Affleck Takes The Gold

There was a lot going on this past Sunday, it was Oscar night and I was in Vegas, visiting with a few of my girlfriends. The cheese spread was laid out, the veggies cut into perfect squares, and glasses of white wine flowed as we clutched our Oscar prediction ballots, not knowing this would become one of the most memorable Academy Award nights in history due to the baffling envelope mix-up that temporarily awarded the Best Picture to the wrong film. Within seconds, this unprecedented snafu became the headline that would haunt you for days if you were daring enough to turn on the television, radio, computer or even pick up a newspaper (’cause yes, they still exist). Like the nagging hook on an otherwise good song, it was all that people cared to talk about, probably because for the most part, if you didn’t watch the entire show, it was all you had heard about. But I feel it’s important to take a pause from addressing that particular WTF moment to examine another, and that was the awarding of the Best Leading Actor Oscar to the significantly lesser of the two Afflecks, Casey.

Manchester By The Sea is a decent film, sure  it’s a sad, depressing picture about loss, set in Boston led by a sullen man who requires few words – leaving Michelle Williams to do all the emotional heavy lifting in the most powerful scene of the film. And for the most part, Casey Affleck nailed the part, he can do the brooding Boston thing and we all know this because it is pretty much the only role he has ever played.  Gone Baby Gone, Good Will Hunting, Oceans Eleven – these are his biggest roles and he always plays “dat Boston guy.” Casey Affleck is a one-trick pony and yet somehow managed to get rewarded for yet another one of his carbon copy performances this year by taking home an Oscar! How did this happen?

As a voting member for the Television Academy, I have a little insight to the mind of a voter and I must admit I am perplexed at the selections made this year. Personally, I feel it is taken far too lightly if a voter doesn’t take into consideration the actual skill and range of the person they are selecting to win the highest honor of the year. For example if you were looking to cast someone in the role of a DEA agent in Texas, or a Pennsylvania Mennonite – or heck, even a California surfer,  Casey Affleck ain’t your guy. This guy is only this {} much more qualified as an actor than the pizza guy in a porn. Technically, the same could be said for Emma Stone, who has run the “I’m such a down-to-earth, cool, guy’s girl, look at my big eyes” role into the ground, but I could actually imagine her offering some range if she would dare herself to do something powerful that landed her miles outside of her comfort zone. Affleck on the other hand, I don’t think is even capable. So, without even taking into consideration the sexual assault allegations against Casey, or the astonishingly poor behavior Stone displayed when trying to stir the Best Picture shit pot by insinuating the academy outright lied about the envelope swap to multiple reporters, I sit here scratching my head wondering how these two jokers are walking away with the title Best of anything. Guess this is one more example of how 2016 was a year chockfull of terrible voting results.

Advertisement

The Might of the Snowflake

“Snowflake” has become the conservative anthem. Hurled frequent and loud to the modern-day liberal as an insult, it’s popularity grew in 2016 and like a broken record, it repeats on an endless loop, filling the bellies of the parties bottom-dwelling trolls with endless joy. I am not entirely sure who is due credit for coining the term, though like most conservative ideas, I assume it caught fire by being showcased on the Fox Network at some point, either by an anchor or guest, but more than likely both. And like the good parrots they are, it became one of ten words solidified in the Trumpster’s dictionary, right next to Benghazi, emails, and Lyin’ Ted.

Not exclusively used to reference the millennial movement any longer, even party leaders are subject to low-brow taunt.

Screen Shot 2017-02-06 at 11.19.32 AM.png

Ah yes, we get it, snowflakes are delicate and easily destroyed, zing, Wayne Dupree! And for many Trumpsters, the irony is completely lost on them that they recite endlessly about the weakness of the left but then want to stockpile guns, thinks ISIS is everywhere and are afraid of Muslims, even the babies coming into the country seeking desperately needed medical treatment. I’m not saying that all conservatives feel this way, I happen to know a lot of conservatives who are decent people and they tend to be the kind to engage in meaningful discussions and avoid the pettiness displayed by the conservative types who slum low and address people as Libtards.  I mean, the tweeter above seems to think he deserves a slow clap for saving America? Give me a break!

All this slandering rhetoric does is light a fire in the heart of the liberals. They are uniting and mobilizing, fighting for civil rights and against authoritarianism and a rigged political system. And as their voices unit, they as a whole grown stronger everyday. So, call them snowflakes if you must, but keep in mind when a whole lot of snowflakes amass and move rapidly in one direction – that’s called a fucking avalanche.

Screen Shot 2017-02-06 at 12.50.46 PM.png

Word to the wise – don’t underestimate the might of a Snowflake.